Monday, 18 July 2011
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"So how's married life?"
I'm not even joking when I say that I got that question over 50 times on Saturday. I went to my fraternity's annual softball tournament and every brother I sat down to chat with asked me that question. I answered along the lines of, "Good, nothing changed," and many of them were shocked. It was as if they expected marriage to be some kind of dimensional shift for the relationship and life is completely different.
I expected my marriage to be relatively similar to how things were before we got married. I didn't think much would change except for our marital status and it may take a couple of years or at least having one child before things would be different.
What are your thoughts regarding marriage? What I mean is, if you aren't married yet, what do you expect marriage life to be like? And if you're married already, is marriage life different from what you imagined it to be before you got married?
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Comments (20)
It probably won't hit me initially, but once the kids come in I'm sure it will change my life completely.
We must be on a similar wavelength; I talked about that very thing a couple of posts back...
I guess some people will feel more annoyed for seeing someone 24-7. Things that you don't see prior to marriage. For example, the way they do things might bug the hell out of you. You might find that she does the laundry differently from you, or vice versa. Perhaps she's the one who is fed up with you. lol. Or maybe, you've live together prior to marriage and you've already seen all her good and bad habits.
So then why get married in the first place? The tax benefits?
lol i guess living together u can actually see if there is something wrong and living together is good lol
i think its because you were living together before so it doesn't seem that different. see you at your wedding! can't wait for bbq hehe
we lived together before getting married so it wasn't all that different for us, too. but it was nicer to call him my husband than boyfriend or fiance. still took some getting used to.
that's great that nothing's changed and things are seemingly going smoothly.
i'm only 22 so i can't even imagine being in a long term relationship right now.I hope to someday be married to someone I consider my best friend and partner. I like kids very much but don't want to be a parent, and it's hard to find someone who doesn't want children either.
My husband and I had been together for 4.5 years when we got married, so for us married life wasn't that different. I remember getting those questions too, and seeing the disappointment in our friends' faces whenever we told them that being married wasn't different.
That being said, we always took to heart what our pastor told us at our premarital counseling — that he does not believe in a honeymoon stage, because what does it say about your marriage if the happiest times were the first few months/years? So while we have definitely been through some rough patches in our 3+ years of marriage, we are now happier than ever and closer to each other than ever before.
So back then, the few months after marriage when everyone was asking us that question, our honest answer was that there didn't seem to be much of a difference. But if you compare us pre-marriage to our relationship now, we will both tell you that marriage is tough but WONDERFUL, and that we are more in love with each other as a result of marriage.
Everyone says it's like night and day. The guy changes completely. All the romance is gone.
I feel the same way with my boyfriend after we celebrate our anniversary every year. We've been together for 3 years now and after the first year I quickly realized that anniversaries are not a big deal at all. Our relationship continues the same but gradually we grow stronger without being conscious of it.
if you have lived together before, then not much will change likely. if your relationship is idiotic and superficial, one of you may get really excited and act like the world has turned upside-down.
Hasn't changed that much...although we're not officially married yet cause we forgot to get the marriage license before the ceremony...oops
Lovely engagement pictures...have a great wedding!@torisun - How did you see the pictures? Do I know you? lol.
-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
unbelievable that you're still getting eprops.
@chiiii_baby - lol. I'm sorry. Has my writing sucked that much lately?
-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
My fiance and I just moved in together in mid-June, as we are planning our wedding next year August. I think our married life would be like now--packing each other's lunches, cooking dinners together, me chatting on about laundry and his stinky socks, etc... haha After the wedding, we're going on a somewhat long honeymoon, so until we get back (or move abroad) before kids, it's probably going be the same thing in a different location or in a diff. language.
IF we weren't living together now and we got married, I think it'll be a bit disorientating for me because I never lived without my family. In Sept, when he's off to do his MBA, I guess it'll be more work on me and I won't see him as he picks me up from work almost every day. But again, not too much change until we start having kids. :)
it's the same ... you just own nicer plates than you would've bought for yourself.=)
I think it's going to be wonderful, you'll get to spend your life with the person you love...what can beat that??