December 9, 2011
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Grandchildren
My parents were tough as nails when I was a kid. I used to be so scared of my father that I’d pretend that I was asleep so that when he got home and my grandmother reported my bad behavior to him, he wouldn’t wake me up and kick my ass. I’m pretty sure he knew I wasn’t asleep, especially since I was born with a sleeping disorder
I don’t think my dad has ever said the words, “I love you” to me or my sister. But what’s funny is that he says it to my nephew all the time! What’s up with grandchildren that turn tough Asian parents into marshmallows? For years, I have been trying to get my dad to buy a dryer. They’re old school, which means some clothes are still hand-washed, and all clothes are hung to dry, in the backyard if it’d warm or in the basement if it’s cold. But the clothes don’t feel nice because they become hard, mostly because of lint. My dad kept on saying, “my house, my rules, no dryer because it’s a waste of money.”
Fastforward to last week, when my nephew was here for the week. He has a blanket that he loves to hold onto, but because he needs it every couple of hours, it’s almost impossible to wash. The only way is to throw it in the washer and then in a dryer, otherwise it wouldn’t dry in time and he would cry nonstop until you gave it back. It had to feel the same and smell the same too. Can’t even use a different detergent, softener or dryer paper on it. So we had a dilemma. What did my dad do? He told me to go out with him and buy a dryer. We just went out that day, looked at a couple of models and bought one. The whole thing from decision to purchase was like 2 hours. For YEARS, I couldn’t convince him. One needy grandson was all it took to turn this grumpy Chinese man, to a giant teddy bear. My father holds him and plays with him. I can’t remember seeing my father so happy all the time.
I’m glad that my nephew is around often enough that my parents don’t give me any pressure to have my own.
My father with my nephew at around 6 months. He’s 2 now.
Comments (18)
aww.
aww cute. I don’t use dryer too.
Prob happy cuz it ain’t his kid, lol.
haha no grandchildren in the fam yet, but as everyone gets older, the parents are turning into mush. My eldest aunt demands a kiss from me every time I see her. We are not an “I love you family” either– let alone a physical contact one. Well, besides getting an ass whooping. =P
Anyway, perhaps when your nephew gets to that age where he may not be so cute anymore, the pressure will be on you and your wife to have a kid. lol
Love it! love the picture too
awwww… this makes me miss my grandparents. i think all chinese parents have a soft spot for kids, but it’s just different when it’s their own kid vs. their grandchildren. prob just stems from whether or not a responsibility exists for their upbringing/discipline. cute post!
lol ur lucky. my dad would drag me out the bed to beat my ass no matter how late it was.
@wonderland7386 - lol. Honestly, he beat me a lot growing up–until I was 16! And it was only a few years had was working late. Much of the time, he’d come home, have dinner, listen to the complaints from my grandmother and then kick my ass. Very routine. lol.
-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
yeahh the child is not his own kid! LOL. my parents had a dryer cause they used cloth nappies for my younger brother. so it was in need to have it dried and used straight away
my mother would whoop my ass if i didn’t go to bed. i remember i wanted to watch the sound of music when i was 8 and she whooped my ass cause i kept on watching the damn movie.
i haven’t watched sound of music since
@nomilktoday - lol. Not since?! That’s crazy! It’s such a good movie!
-ray leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
I think with your own kids you’re too worried about building them up to be good people to be soft but with grand kids you’re giving them all the affection you couldn’t give your own kids because their fate ultimately doesn’t lie in their hands
Your nephew is so cute!!
i tell my mom i love you, and in returns, she says thank you.. then i ask, aren’t you going to say I Love you? and she says no. asian parents, lol. but i know she loves me. with my niece, my mom gives her the world. i get you say though. tough love.
My dad has never, that I can remember, actually said I love you, out loud to me, either. I don’t say it to him either, because it seems to make him uncomfortable. I think he’s written it in milestone birthday cards, but that’s it. I’m not sure that he says it to my niece either though. I think he’s just the type of person who’s not comfortable saying it.
I think the fact that your parents are different with their grandson is that they feel they don’t have the responsibility for him. If you will, they can return him after a day. But one’s own children … one cannot return, one has responsibility for them.
Your dad makes me think of what my dad said about Sammie. He said I’m not like you guys. I won’t hug and kiss and say I love you. Lol. Now he is the biggest softie. He loves holdin her and saying, “gwai schewn!”. Lol
My mom says its easier to spoil her grandchildren than it is to us … she doesn’t have to deal with the aftermath -_-”
Haha yeah that happens my niece is 4 I believe. My dad loves that kid. Plus my grandparents love him too. =op