Monday, 06 July 2009
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Suggestions?
Couldn't think of anything to write about.
How about auggesting something? Maybe pose a question about something you want to know.
Happy Monday!
Thursday, 02 July 2009
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Meet the parents
The girlfriend will be having dinner with my parents this weekend. I called my mom last night to tell her that I was bringing home my girlfriend and her response was, "finally bringing her home to see me?" She thinks I'm holding out on her! Surprisingly, she didn't ask me any questions except what she likes to eat. I guess she didn't have her long list of questions on-hand at that moment.
Meeting the parents is a pretty big step in the relationship. I haven't met E's parents yet, but I'm planning to next month. I'm sure I'll be liked. All my friends' parents like me. Besides, I have a month to prepare for all the possible interrogation questions that will be thrown at me.
Imagine the responses were like, "Yes we have unprotected sex." "No, we don't care about being parents at such a young age." "Yes, I'm unemployed and live on food stamps." "No, the food stamps are only for me." I'd have my gun cocked under the table if I was meeting my daughter's boyfriend.
I'd definitely be one of those dads that will straight up threaten the daughter's boyfriend with castration. "Do you know what a eunuch is?" Mental note to self--knives and gun collection to be showcased in the living room.
I asked E if she was ready and she said she was, but still nervous. I told her there was nothing to be nervous about. I assured her that my parents would like her. They are some of the nicest people you would/could meet. They only terrorize and torture their own children.
Have you met your significant other's parents yet? Were you nervous? Do they like you? Do you like them? How about your parents and your significant other?
I wonder if anyone ever thinks relationships are easy.
Wednesday, 01 July 2009
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How the US economy is operating today
Something interesting I read yesterday. I usually don't share these things in my blog, but I think it really puts things into perspective.
Thoughts?
"How the US economy is operating today.
It is a slow day in the East Texas town of Madisonville.
It is raining, and the little town looks totally deserted.
Times are tough, everybody is in debt and everybody lives on credit.
On this particular day a rich tourist from the East is driving through town.
He enters the only hotel in the sleepy town and lays a hundred dollar bill on the desk stating he wants to inspect the rooms upstairs in order to pick one to spend the night.
As soon as the man walks up the stairs, the hotel proprietor takes the hundred dollar bill and runs next door to pay his debt to the butcher.
The butcher takes the $100 and runs down the street to pay his debt to the pig farmer.
The pig farmer then takes the $100 and heads off to pay his debt to the supplier of feed and fuel.
The guy at the Farmer's Co-op takes the $100 and runs to pay his debt to the local prostitute, who has also been facing hard times and has lately had to offer her "services" on credit.
The prostitute runs to the hotel and pays off her debt with the $100 to the hotel proprietor, paying for the rooms that she had rented when she brought clients to that establishment.
The hotel proprietor then lays the $100 bill back on the counter so the rich traveler will not suspect anything.
At that moment the traveler from the East walks back down the stairs, after inspecting the rooms. He picks up the $100 bill and states that the rooms are not satisfactory...... Pockets the money and walks out the door and leaves town.
No one earned anything. However the whole town is now out of debt, and looks to the future with a lot of optimism."
Monday, 29 June 2009
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Defining friendship, with (or without) a wedding inivitation
My friend called early Saturday morning while I was walking around Baltimore. It was like 8:30am from where she called, so I knew something was wrong an she wanted to talk. She told me that her "friend" invited her out to dinner the night before an had something important to tell her--she was getting married in October. Problem was, my friend wasn't invited.
So the conversation started with a mutual friend leaving another mutual friend on Facebook, telling the person that they be seeing each other at "the bride's" wedding. Apparently, first person assumed he/she was invited. So "the bride" told this story to my friend during dinner, which caused my friend to inquire about her own invitation. The response, "so you're one of those assuming people."
It's understandable sometimes when you're not invited. It might be a small wedding with just some extremely close friends and family, so my friend didn't get upset and asked "the bride" about her wedding. It's going to be around 100 people and some of their mutual friends are invited.
Obviously, my friend is hurt. She wrongfully assumed that they were close and at that moment, was able to accurately gauge the level of their friendship based on that invitation list. She knew who was close to her and she wasn't one of them.
I completely understand that people can't invite everyone to their wedding. My qualm is, why invite someone to dinner, tell them you're getting married and then tell them they're NOT invited?What kind of friend does that? If there were people I wasn't inviting, I would never mention anything to them. They can take a hint or they can ask me. At least I wouldn't be the one provoking it by talking about my wedding that I'm not inviting them to. It's literally slapping someone in the face. "Be happy for me! I'm getting married! I'm inviting this person and that person. You? Sorry, but you're not invited. Be happy for me anyway!"
You know what's worse? When they tell you about the wedding to your face, but don't tell you that you're not invited. You have to battle it out within yorself to ask. I was in the same situation before and I had to convince myself that there was a reason why my friend wasn't inviting me. I never asked because I didn't want to be given an invitation out of pity. I took it the best I could, but like my friend, understood where I belonged in that person's heart.
You can't satisfy everyone and weddings ARE expensive. You can't invite everyone you know to yours. But know that you are defining the friendship by inviting or not inviting someone. Don't make things worse by talking about your wedding to those you're not inviting. Lastly, don't be surprised when you're not invited to their's.
Thursday, 25 June 2009
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No MP3-player!? Crazy!
Last night I was talking to my girlfriend E about what I was reading at the moment and somehow, we got into the discussion of mp3-players. In fact, I asked her, "what mp3-player do you use?" To my surprise, she said she didn't own one. Crazy!
You could literally hear me gasp as I tried to imagine the thought of not owning a portable music player. It's almost like someone telling me they don't own a tv or worse, a computer--it's just that crazy (yes, I used the word again).
It really shocked me because we often talk about music and though our tastes are really (extremely) different, I have been opening up and giving her suggestions a try. With that said, I knew she was a music lover. Apparently, only in front of her computer, at the comfort of her own home.
What does she listen to on the train, on the way to work? Nothing. On good days, she reads. Some days, she eavesdrops on random conversations. But none of her activities have anything to do with music and she tells me she doesn't need it. She doesn't need music... she is one amazing women, ladies and gentlemen (no sarcasm!).
Recently, my earphones broke and I had to send them back in for a replacement. The whole process took about two weeks so for two weeks, I was music-less on my journey to work. It was hard, but bearable. I felt like a smoker who couldn't get his hands on cigarettes for two weeks. You deal, but not by choice. At least as a smoker, you can bum one off another, but it's not like I can ask the person next to me for a side of their headphones.
I'm sure at least 95% of the people who read this blog owns one. If you are the 5%, why? If you're the 95%, how long can you go without it?
****
My thoughts on the Prince Charming post can be found in the comments section of my previous post. I didn't want to steal the thunder from this post or time stamp the previous one.
Monday, 22 June 2009
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Prince Charming
I was reading a list of "Five Guys You Should Not Date," and Number one on the list caught my eye.
"1. Prince Charming
Once upon a time, your white knight in shining armor came and rescued you from this abysmal life known as reality. Out of all the women in the land, he chose you as his one true love. As you guys live happily ever after, he shares his inheritance, carriage, castle, and all the kingdoms in the land with you.
But for this mythical being to appear, you have to risk being poisoned and be in a state of unconsciousness for an indefinite period of time. I think this is a lot to ask from an imaginary person."
Based on this passage, who do you think the author is implying by "Prince Charming" and what does she mean? Do you think it's true?
I have my own opinion, but I don't want to influence your answer. I'll post my response up maybe Wednesday or on my next update on Thursday. Also, please don't read the other comments before posting yours! Thanks!
Thursday, 18 June 2009
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Cheating: Is it ever deserved?
I was reading this article on CNN, which tries to cite an example where cheating on your significant other was deserved (or at least you shouldn't be surprised if it happened) and it made me think about whether it really made sense.
Here are the cliffs (provided by CNN) on the article so you don't really have to read it:
• Writer says that if Jon Gosselin (from Jon and Kate Plus 8) cheated on his wife, she may have deserved it.
• Quotes blog that says Kate Gosselin humiliated, degraded, emasculated husband.
• Writer: Cheating isn't right, but neither is emotional abuse and neglect.
So even though the writer in the article doesn't really justify Jon cheating, she makes a point that, "If you push someone enough, it shouldn't be any surprise when you push him into the arms of someone else."
Personally, I have never watched the show, but quite a few people I know who has/does do mention that Kate treats her husband like shit. I agree with the writer that though cheating isn't right, why should anyone be surprised that Jon cheated on her (assuming that he did)?
What bothered me most was reading the comments at the bottom of the article, where some people were like, "if she was such a bad wife, you should just end the relationship, not cheat." I don't know who those people are or what rock they are living it under, but Jon does have 8 kids. He can't just pick up and go.
It also doesn't surprise me that Kate KNOWS that she's treats Jon like crap. Apparently, she doesn't care what people think, but what about what Jon thinks? She probably doesn't care about that either.
Anytime communication falls through, problems are bound to happen. I would never condone cheating and two wrongs definitely don't make a right. But what do you do if you were Jon? Everyone needs love.
Monday, 15 June 2009
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Marrying your in-laws
So you've been in a long term relationship with your significant other. You know you love him/her and you are pretty much ready take the leap into the next step of the relationship. Fortunately for you, your significant other feels the same way for you. Unfortunately, you hate your SO's family. What do you do?
A good friend of mine is precisely in that situation. She loves her boyfriend and they have been together for quite some time. She lives with him in his house that also houses the rest of his family. She gets along with them, but day in and day out, they do things that drive her crazy, especially the boyfriend's crazy older sister who only cares about herself and her mother who does nice things, but with ulterior intentions for control.
If my friend marries her boyfriend, they would be living exactly where they are now. It's a big house with multiple floors so one day, they might have privacy with their own floor--as soon as renovations are made. The problem is, there seems to be no definite date in sight of when any work will be done and the living situation now hasn't changed since forever. Obviously, the situation is a lot more complicated and there's a lot more to the story, but you get the picture.
As a guy, I'm fortunate enough to not have to worry about living with my future in-laws. I would assume my future wife would live where I live (upon mutual agreement of course). But what if you're a women with a guy who purchased a house with/for his parents so everyone can live together? What if he's making the mortgage payments there and can't afford to put a downpayment on a house of his own? Of his family is nice, there wouldn't be a problem, but we all know how parents can get. Even the nicest ones will drive you crazy in time.
I think if my future wife had a problem with my family, I'd definitely do something about it--either step up and mediate or move out. No one wants to be in the middle of these disputes because it's like your left hand not agreeing with your right. No one wins if there are issues involved.
Maybe because I don't really have a parent/child relationship with my parents, I can just not listen to what they say. I literally don't care and I would tune out my significant other's parents/family as well. They might find me disrespectful, but this is 2009--respect is given where it is due. It's not automatic and it's not free.
The last thing I want is people imposing their thoughts and beliefs on me. I mean, if my future in-laws are appalled with the idea of a BBQ wedding, what do I do? I'm not going to listen to them because it's not their wedding. As long as my wife agrees with me, then that's the most important thing. If anything, I could just not invite them right?
What would you do if you hated your significant other's family?
Thursday, 11 June 2009
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I don't dance
I am one of those guys who stand around on the side at clubs, cradling my drink and watching the crowd, while talking to other fellow non-dancing people around me. Occassionally, I'll move from my spot, but it's either to go to the bathroom or the bar. mikim0to has seen this and wondered why I wasn't dancing. In the back of her mind like pretty much everyone else's mind, it must be because I can't dance. I'm not the best dancer, but that's not the real reason. The real reason? I just don't like physical contact with people I'm unfamiliar with.
You might be thinking (just how she thought), you don't need to touch when you dance! That is true, except people don't really think that at clubs; especially like the one we were at, that was extremely packed. There's literally no space to move besides up against each others.
Most Asians associate dancing to grinding. It's not, but that's the norm. What happens when the girl I'm casually dancing with, moves closer? Two choices--stand my ground and let it happen or try to move away without her noticing. The first choice makes me feel uncomfortable and the second choice makes her uncomfortable. I think it's just better to not dance at all--no awkward moments.
Sometimes you would catch me dancing, but it's never at a club and always with someone I know. The problem is, people see you dancing and think it's okay to join. If you're a girl and you reject a guy, it's perfectly okay, but if you're a guy and you reject a girl on the dance floor, it's just wrong. It happens whenever I'm dancing with someone and someone else comes over--someone who knows me, but doesn't really know me. Or even someone I just met. She's like, "hey, how come you're dancing with her? I thought you said you don't dance?". I mean, what if I was dancing with mikim0to and her friend who asked me to dance before sees it? Not that any of this remotely happened, but you get the picture.
So why don't I like physical contact? I have no idea. I'm fine with people I know and talk to on a regular basis. If I don't know your last name or something trivial like if you have sibblings, chances are, I won't be comfortable. I think maybe it had to do with all the beatings I got as a kid (I got beat a couple of times a week from 3 years old to 16) and the lack of love and embrace from my parents really caused some kind of psychological damage--who knows.
So the question is, CAN I dance? Well, that really depends on what standard. I definitely can't even dream of making it on KABA Modern, but I can move without looking awkward. I actually like to dance and I hope to one day take ballroom dancing.
I wonder if there's someone else out there like me who doesn't dance because he/she doesn't like physical contact. Do you dance?
Random note: People have been wondering what I'm doing with my hand in my profile picture. No, I'm not doing the "Shocker." I'm actually trying to throw up my fraternity's handsign, which looks like an N. I'll post up a picture later when I get a chance.
Monday, 08 June 2009
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BBQ!
Long time readers know about me and my love for BBQs. I have even previously stated that if I could have it my way, two of the handful of important days in my life (my wedding and funeral), will be BBQs (weather and wife permitting of course).
I have to first clarify that BBQ isn't my favorite kind of food in the world, but there is no get together that is more fun and easy than having a BBQ. People think it's a lot of work and expensive, but all you need is a grill, coal, food and people! Instead of doing all the work, just have everyone bring something (plastic utensils, plates, cups, drinks, etc) and you just have to take care of the important things. I would say on average, it costs as little as $10 and as much as $20 per person for all you can eat/drink! Can't beat that!
Some of you might think it's crazy, but I normally pack a grill in my car with a bag of coal and a folding table so I can BBQ anytime. You never know when you just want to BBQ with a couple of people!
As for food, I usually just eat hot dogs and burgers, but I prefer to serve good food like wings, pork chops, and short ribs. My good friend Patrick is in the meat business and I get all my food pre-marinated from him. I call him up a day or two with my order and pick it up in Chinatown morning of BBQ. He has everything you want (even burgers and hot dogs). I usually just tell him how many people are attending and he'll recommend the amount of food to get.
I would say you should definitely give him a call at 917.903.3099 if you are in NYC (or Jersey) and you don't mind pickng up from Chinatown. The short ribs and pork chops are awesome! Tell him I sent you and he'll take care of you (I don't get anything out of this, so just trust me!).
I also love making my own burgers. Apparently word has caught on like wild fire the last couple of years and my "jigg burgers" (I swear I didn't come up with that name!) have really been the talk of the towb, but definitely hyped up too much in my opinion. But if you wanted to make burgers, I recommend a good blend of chuck (75%) and sirloin (25%). Onions, shallots, salt and pepper of course, but the trick is a generous amount of worchestershire sauce. As for in what proportions--that's for you to figure out. Jist make sure you pack them big since they will shrink when grilled.
Anyway, I've only been to one BBQ so far, but I'm definitely looking forward to at least once a month. I mean, how can anyone not like BBQs? Just don't forget the alcohol (and the sunblock)!
True
Lifetime411
Age: 28
Marital Status: Is in a committed and exclusive relationship
Current Location: Brooklyn, New York
Raised in: Sheepshead Bay, Brooklyn
Location of Residence: Brooklyn
Employment Status: Financial Analyst
Major: Modern European History
Favorite things to do: Sing, Read, Write, Listen to music, Fish, watching Anime, Rock climbing and bouldering...
Expert at: Carrying interesting conversations and sounding smart, but being otherwise.
Currently looking for:
Primary Goals in life: Marriage, having children, PhD in History
Other Goals: Experience the maximum amount of experiences, see the world, become a writer and have some books published, run a marathon, climb a mountain...
Current location in life: In New York, just working my way up the corporate ladder.
Possible paths for the future: Masters Degree in History, NYC HS Teacher
Favorite sports: Baseball, Soccer, Hockey, Football
Favorite Teams: Yankees, Manchester United, Pittsburgh Penguins, 49ers
Favorite athletes: Don Mattingly, David Cone, Teddy Sheringham, David Beckham
Most Hated Teams: Boston Red Sox, Liverpool FC, Leeds United
Likes: Great conversations, good food, good people, bamboo paintings, Prada, tattoos, piercings...
Tattoos: 1
Located at: Upper left arm.
Piercings: 4
Located at: Two on each earlobe.
Things I like to do: Listen to music, chit chatting online, ponder about life, going to museums, any kind of site seeing, writing fiction, taking random pics of things, have long conversations at cafes or bars, watching and playing sports (baseball, soccer, football), surf the internet, read all kinds of books, reading magazines, give advice, watch movies, watch Broadway, eating out at good restaurants, shopping, travelling, road tripping, fishing, rock climbing, drinking, xanga
Favorite cuisine: Italian, American, French, Mexican, Vietnamese, Chinese
Favorite Junk Food: Chips (Salt and Vinegar, Sour Cream and Garlic), All kinds of Nachos, Tostitos with Salsa, Chocolate chip cookies with milk, dark chocolate -- especially with almonds
Addicted to: Ketchup and Soy Sauce. (Not at the same time!)
Favorite drinks: Pepsi, alchohol, OJ, black tea (especially strawberry black tea).
Preferred Alcoholic Beverages: Red wine - Preferably French, Dark beers (Newcastle Brown Ale, Boddingtons Ale, Guinness) Vodka (Grey Goose, Ketel one), Gin (Tanquerray ONLY), Whiskey (Macallan 12, JW Blue)
Favorite mixed drinks: Kamikaze, Bay Breeze, Whiskey or Bourbon on the Rocks, Tanquerray Martini (Slightly dry with lemon twist)
Hated Alcoholic Beverages: Cheap anything! Cheap alcohol sucks!
Favorite Music genre: Rock (Metal, Alternative, Punk, Hard), Classical (Mozart only), Chinese Rock, Chinese Pop, Japanese Rock
Favorite Bands/Singers: Aerosmith, Guns N Roses, Metallica, Pearl Jam, Beyond, Nirvana, Smashing Pumpkins, Bon Jovi, X Japan, Jacky Cheung, Jay Chou
Favorite Songs: Too many to name
Favorite Movie Genres: Drama, Romantic Comedies, Comedy, Thriller/Mystery, Sci-Fi, Action
Favorite Movies: Top Gun, Forrest Gump, Pulp Fiction, Usual Suspects, Jackass: The Movie, Die Hard Trilogy, Indiana Jones Trilogy, Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Terminator 2, Guns and Talks (Corean), Be with you (Japanese)
Favorite Actors: Jack Nicholson, Kevin Spacey, Ewan McGregor, Tom Hanks, Tom Cruise, Brad Pitt, Johnny Depp, Sir Sean Connery, Robin Williams, Bruce Willis, Edward Norton Jr., Sir Anthony Hopkins, David Duchovny, Tony Leung
Favorite Actresses: Helen Hunt, Gwyneth Palthrow, Julia Roberts, Nicole Kidman, Maggie Cheung
Favorite TV Shows: Law and Order (The Original), X-Files, Star Trek - TNG, Friends, Frasier, Seinfeld, Will and Grace
Favorite Characters from TV: Jack McCoy (Law and Order), Captain Jean-Luc Picard (Star Trek - TNG), Chandler (Friends), Fox Mulder and Dana Scully (X-Files), Niles Crane (Frasier), Jack Bauer (24)
Favorite Anime/Cartoon: DBZ, Naruto, Batman, Spiderman, Fullmetal Panic!, School Rumble
Favorite Cartoon Characters: Spiderman, Vegeta (DBZ), Batman, Kakashi (Naruto), Sabastien (Little Mermaid), Raphael (TMNT), Bugs Bunny
Favorite reads: Mainly classics, lots of non-fiction, detective novels, thrillers, biographies, general fiction
Favorite books: A Tree Grows in Brooklyn (Betty Smith), The Deer and the Cauldron (Louis Cha), Hamlet (William Shakespeare), Moby Dick (Herman Melville), Pride and Prejudice (Jane Austen), Harry Potter - Books 3 and 4 (J.K. Rowling), With Old Breed (E. B. Sledge), Fifth Chinese Daughter (Jade Snow Wong), Three Kingdoms (Translated by Robert Moss)
Below are some of my personal links. Feel free to click on any of them to explore. =)
AIM ?
Literature 101
jiggz Excellent Adventure!
Halfway Mag
Rice Bowl Journals
Weblog Archives
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