Growing up, it was always silent around the dinner table. It was rude to speak with food in your month and after a 14 hour day at work working for a fraction of minimum wage, the last thing my parents wanted to do was talk. Whenever there were talks at the table, it would be my grandmother complaining about how bad I was to my parents and I'd have to prepare myself for scolding or worse, being scolded and followered by an after meal serving of a beating. And people wonder why dessert isn't one of my favorite course of the meal.

Times have changed of course and even back in 2005 when I temporarily moved home, there were actually talks at the dinner table, usually trivial things and stories of my father's past. Thinking back, I really wished my father would have talked more about his life growing up in communist China. His struggles really put things into perspective and it really makes me think about how small my problems have always been.

How big can my problems be when his biggest problem was hunger? During the great famine from 1959-1961, the most conservative estimate of deaths by starvation is over 30 million people. Some people think as many as 75 million. The population of entire countries starved to death. My father and his family had to eat whatever that was in sight just to stay alive. Even when things got better, things never got that much better.

He once asked his brother's friend who was a member of the communist party what the four great Chinese inventions were. The party member answered I'm an obvious tone, "Paper, printing, the compass and gunpowder." My dad asked, "if we invented gunpowder, how come we don't even have matches anymore?" the party member retorted that times in China were great now under Mao's leadership. There's electricity at homes now and people have bicycles. My dad said responded, "Electricity? The people in the west have had that for 100 years! We ride bicycles, but they drive luxuary cars."

I asked my father how could he talk to a communist party member like that. Wasn't he afraid to get caught saying bad things about the party, which meant you would be tortured, then constantly harrassed throughout most of your existing life during the cultural revolution and labeled an enemy of the state. He told me he had to say those things in a hushed tone, with a smirk, as if he was just joking around. Life then was without satisfying meals, matches, soap to clean your clothes, and the freedom to express your disappointment.

Times have changed and things are much better in China now. But it doesn't change the feelings my father had for te country which forced him to flee by risking his life and swimming seven hours to Hong Kong. Starvation and times of desparation leave scars that are only visible to yourself. People never see these scars. I never saw them from my father.

Lately, these talks are happening all around the day. Even my mom chims in with her own stories about growing up with eight sibblings in Hong Kong and her struggles of working as a kid to make enough money so her brothers can have a decent education.

I look forward to dinner everynight.

Do you ever wonder how life was for your parents? Do you ever realize that no matter what, you'll never experience anything remotely close to what your parents went through, simply because it was a different time?

I wouldn't call myself a paranoid person, but I have a bad feeling about the new H1N1 vaccine. Somehow, it reminds me of "I AM LEGEND," where they gave everyone the miracle cancer vaccine and then people either turned into zombies or got killed by them.

Did you know that a lot of hospitals are requiring the personnel to be vaccinated and many of them don't want to? And this isn't just for the swine flu. Turns out that the flu shot you normally get every year doesn't protect you from every strain. Just three and it's determined by a group of people in the CDC who guess which three are likely to strike this year. A couple of years ago, they guessed wrong and many people still got sick.

Maybe these medically trained personnel don't want to get it because there's mercury in it. Not enough to kill you of course, but why would anyone want mercury in their system? It's bad enough we ingest it in the fishes we eat.

Of course mercury isn't the only thing that's harmful in the flu shots. There are other chemicals depending on which shot you get. Click here for more information concerning flu shots.

I will try to stay healthy the old fashioned way by eating healthy, exercising, sleeping as much as I can, and keeping my hands clean.

Always wash your hands thoroughly with soap and avoid touchig anything public with your hands. I always use a paper towel to open the bathroom doors on the way out. I also try not to touch the poles on the train. If I have to, I lean against it with the back/side of my hand or forearm.

Anyway, if people begin turning into zombies, please use common sense. Pick up the Zombie Survival Guide. Hey, you never know right?

Will you be getting the flu shot this year? If you are, you getting the regular one and/or H1N1?

I just moved back home this weekend. I never found an affordable two-bedroom that was close to a train station. Maybe I didn't look hard enough, but I had less than a month and time was really ticking.

I'm sitting at one of the Staten Island stations to take me to the ferry. The ferry then takes me to Manhattan and from there, I have to catch the train to work. Total time is approximately an hour and twenty-five minutes. I don't live near any of the express buses that bring me to work, so this is the commute I will be dealing with for the next 10-12 months.

I have to get to work early today because I start my new position. I stayed a little late last Friday trying to finish some last minute work and never had the chance to pack my things. I'm only moving three floors up so I have plenty of time.

I'm the new Senior Financial Analyst in the International Finance group in the company (same company as before). I really don't know what to expect, but it's a new job so it should be really interesting.

I think it's healthy to always have a new environment every couple of years. It keeps your mind occupied. It's constantly learning to adapt. Things definitely took a strange turn. I didn't expect to move to International Finance and I surely didn't expect to have my parents as roommates.

A couple of years back, I did these Q&A sessions. I'm not feeling too well today, so I won't be posting up an entry. I hope you find these interesting.

It's funny that I really haven't changed much after all this time.

** ** ** **

Global warming/world peace hehehe jkidding. How do you feel about short asian girls around 5'ish? Some guy said that I can give a standing bj...Am I suppose to take that as a compliment?
Posted 1/31/2007 10:32 AM by vietangeleyes - delete - block user

I have no problem dating a girl shorter than me. If she was taller than me, that would be a problem. If she was shorter than me and wore heels that made her taller than me, I would still have a problem. Would I give a girl a chance if she was taller than me? Maybe, but not likely. As for short girls (no offense!), I really have no problem with that. The shortest girl I have dated was under 5ft. And should you take that comment the guy said as a compliment? I would take that as sexual harrassment.

Is girls' education important? How? ^o^
Posted 1/31/2007 10:57 AM by BodyKarmaSoul - delete - block user

I believe that an education should be important to everyone. But for personal preference, I think it is important that my significant other is smart/intelligent. That doesn't necessarily mean she is educated, but they are both synonymous to one another. I would prefer her to be educated and I wouldn't mind if she was smarter/more intelligent/more educated than I am. I find smart girls really attractive and sexy.


wRyTe aBt aZn PrYde~
Posted 1/31/2007 11:03 AM by qnzalvin - delete - block user

First of all, I hate people who type like that and I know you specifically did it to be funny. Anyways, my take on Asian pride is this: I think most (not all) people have pride in whatever their ethnicity is, but Asians are different. Asians are a group of people who have completely different cultures that are forced to be recognized as one main culture. Though similar to other Asian cultures, the Chinese culture is totally different. And you may even add that depending on where your ancestors are from in China, sub-cultures between Chinese groups are different. My naive way of thinking is that I am a citizen of this world and race/ethnicity should not matter. But of course race/ethnicity does matter and that if you should stick together, it would be with people you share the most similarities with. So in a sense, I don't have much (or any) Asian pride, but I am proud of who I am, the languages I speak, the traditions that were passed down to me, the color of my skin and what I will pass down to my children.


hmmm, how about something regarding interracial dating and the possibilities of marriage
Posted 1/31/2007 11:04 AM by lifes_complexities - delete - block user

As pointed out above, I am very indifferent to races and ethnicities. I rather focus on similarities and embrace differences. With that said, I am very openminded to interracial dating. I know a lot of guys (Asian men) who would love to date out of their race, but would call an Asian girl a "sellout" if she dated outside of her race. I hate those double standards and I find it immature and illogical. My parents know this about me already and they accept the fact that I can marry whoever I wish regardless of race/religion. I know a lot of people tend to prefer to marry within their race, but would not mind marrying outside of it. I personally have no preferences in what race I marry. Of course, I do have preferences in terms of personality and such, but race is just not one of the traits that matter.




talk about your suicide? and involvement with gangs? talk about how you're doing in the corporate world? talk about parenting? how you intend on raising your children? talk about things that inspired you?
:)
Posted 1/31/2007 11:13 AM by greenietea - delete - block user

Hmmm... there isn't much that I can elaborate on about my suicide that I haven't already discussed. It was just a very life-changing situation and I feel fortunate to have survived it. Regardless of what I went through, I know everyone has different feelings/thoughts/experiences that affect their choices and decisions, and I still do not have the power to help people with their problems.

My involvement with gangs was short. I was in 7th grade and I was recruited by a couple of people I knew. I didn't join them. One day, my of my friends got into a fight at lunch and no one backed him up. I ran through and jumped in to help him. I felt like that's how people were in school--they wouldn't have your back when you needed it. I wanted support so afterwards my friend told his friends about what happened and how I helped him. He knew the gang members and once again, they asked me to join. The person who recruited me this time had this aura of charisma. There was something about him that made me feel respect right away and I followed him as his subordinate. I rather not discuss what I did while I was a part of a gang, but I will say that I only followed them for about 10 months before I left.

The corporate world is a funny thing. I can't say I like what I do, because I don't. Yet, I don't dislike it either. It's a very indifferent attitude. As my boy Alvin would say, "work is work." However, as much as I am indifferent with what I do, I love my job. My co-workers and supervisors are great and they are really the main reason why I have not ventured into another job (that pays more or whatever). I don't think its hard for me to find a job that is better, but I'd risk going to a place that would have crazy hours and terrible/unfriendly/ co-workers. All corporate jobs are bureacratic and political. But within my department, there is none of that and I enjoy working with people like that.

As for parenting, I think about that a lot. I cannot wait to be a husband and I cannot wait to be a father. I really wish to marry someone who is willing to adopt because I really want to. I feel bad that we continually create new life, yet there are so many kids out there who need a family. As for kids, I want at least 1 and hopefully, no more than 4. Three is a good number. I'd want daughters... I don't know why. If I had all daughters and no sons, I'd be content, but if I had all sons and no daughters, I'd be disappointed.

I would raise my kids to be good people. Where they go in life and what they want to do is entirely up to them. I believe that we should all be in control of our own lives and we should all be responsible for our own decisions. I'd make sure I'd provide my children with everything they need and nothing they want. If they want something, they would have to earn it. I was never spoiled and I will never spoil. And if they were bad, I would never hit my children. I got beaten all my life and I know that it doesn't work. Punishment will be served, but violence will not be allowed or tolerated in my home.

As for inspirations, life itself is an inspiration. Everyday I wake up, I'm glad that I woke up. I want to live and experience different things. I work for the means to live, never because of money. People spend too much time trying to make more money than they need because they feel that they really need so much. A friend once said to me that he was worried that 100k a year wouldn't be sufficient enough for him to raise a family. I make more than both my parents combined and if they were able to raise two kids, buy a house and a car with their income, there is no way I can't do it with mine. Sure... it would be hard, but that's all part of life. I want the free time so I can see my children grow--to go their ballgames and to their plays. I want to see my children graduate from their schools and most importantly, support them not with just money, but with my time.


you would really have a problem dating a girl taller than you?
Posted 1/31/2007 11:36 AM by SarahakaHungry - delete - block user

Unfortunately, I will admit that is a problem. However, love does conquer all, does it not? If I really fell in love with someone who was taller than me, then that's when it's not a problem.


OOOohh does it make a girl more attractive if she can drink and not get plaster easily? I cant hold my liquor even if its to save a soul. =( Sometimes I feel sorta bad that I'm such a weak drinker...
Posted 1/31/2007 11:57 AM by vietangeleyes - delete - block user

Drinking doesn't make a girl more attractive. It wouldn't matter to me if a girl didn't drink at all. What is unattractive however, is a girl who goes crazy when she drinks and pretends she can drink a whole lot more than she can handle. I understand that not everyone can drink. However, I will admit that a girl who likes beer (especially good beer) is attractive.


Do you believe in soul mates or "the one"? Is there really such a thing as the perfect job? Have you ever fantasized about killing someone with a Durian?

ahhh...deep thoughts...
Posted 1/31/2007 12:03 PM by QumQuat604 - delete - block user

I do believe in soulmates and I do believe that there is someone for everyone. I also believe that most people do not/would not find that person ever.

There is really such a thing as the perfect job. It's a job where you love what you do and that pays well without stepping on any of your morals and principles.

When I think about killing someone, it's never a fantasy. I don't feel good about it. It's usually a passing thought of anger. However, my weapon of choice is fortunately, never a Durian.



Tits or ass?
Posted 1/31/2007 12:41 PM by Yosho - delete - block user

In the order of superficial traits that I find attractive, I'd prefer a girl with a nice butt. I don't think breasts ranks anywhere near the top. Having a beautiful smile ranks #1 and legs would be #2.


Did you front when I said I tossed your aol dosun account and you said you cancelled AOL yourself! ? lol!!
Posted 1/31/2007 1:06 PM by billings - delete - block user

I only ever had 1 AOL legit account and it was never tossed. When I got the account, we were already friends. All the accounts before that were phishes and if you did term them, then what can I say?


hmmm, since i'm bored...here's another: would you date a "fat" girl? and how fat is too fat?
Posted 1/31/2007 1:47 PM by lifes_complexities - delete - block user

No, I would not. I'd be lying if I said looks did not matter, because in fact it does. However, she doesn't have to be pretty... but at least decent looking. I would go out with someone who is a bit overweight (more than the scientifically range of average weight for her age/height). At the same time, I cannot date a girl who is anorexic looking either, so normal (average) looking would be key.


Would u rather A)Be single and wait around for a really dope girl or B)Hook up with a whatever girl just to get by until dope girl comes around?

Personally im a quality and not quantity kind of guy. These days its been rough as the quantity of dope girls has become scarce.
Posted 1/31/2007 2:10 PM by deux02 - delete - block user

I have been single since October 2002 after I broke up with my last girlfriend. Since then, I have not dated anyone, had any intimate relations with anyone or even flirted with anyone. It's been almost 4.5 years and yet I'm still waiting for the right girl to come along.


a woman (but dull) who would be a fantastic mom to your kids, or a hot momma that will rock your world and keep you happy (but not a good mother)
Posted 1/31/2007 2:13 PM by whatdoyouseenow - delete - block user

Do you mean dull as in looks? My standard is that the girl has to be at least decent looking (can't be ugly). If she is plain looking, but not ugly, then I would date her. If she turns out to be a fantastic person, then marriage would come into play. If I was dating a really hot girl and she wasn't the greatest person, then marriage wouldn't come into play. I will not marry someone based on their ability to be a good parent. I will marry her because I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.


HAHA omg, ppl ask weird questions
Posted 1/31/2007 2:16 PM by Nanakins - delete - block user

Not really that weird. It's keeping everyone entertained is it not? =)


after you die.. would you rather be remembered for something absolutely horrific, or not remembered at all? oh and.. will you marry me?
Posted 1/31/2007 2:28 PM by eeleigna - delete - block user

I do not have the physical ability to do anything horrific so I don't think this would apply to me. However, if I had to choose, then I rather not be remembered at all.

And sorry, I would have to decline your offer of marriage. I cannot marry anyone who I do not love.


maybe those dope girls are the fat girls that you wouldn't date. hahahaha. thanks for the entertainment though.
Posted 1/31/2007 2:42 PM by lifes_complexities - delete - block user

Maybe, but we all have standards. To sum it up and to add more specifics, this is what I look for in a girl:

Looks -
Decent looking (a 5 in a scale of 1-10 with 1 being ugly and 10 being gorgeous)
Not anorexic skinny and not fat. I prefer athletic build. Any girl who exercises or into sports is more attractive than say... someone who is just naturally skinny. I don't mean that athletic build is better looking... I just prefer it.
Tall is fine, but not taller than me (I'm 5'8")
Personality -

• Genuinely nice. I know a lot of people who are superficially nice. They just pretend that they are there for you, but in reality, they are just egoists.
• Have a sense of humor.
• Smart/Intelligent. I find girls who are intelligent really sexy.
• I would prefer a girl to be more down-to-earth and not so aggressive. I noticed that intelligent girls are also likely to be aggressive in personality. For those who read selectively, I'm not saying all intelligent girls are aggressive, just that the ones I have encountered are more likely to be.
• Responsible. I want a girl who understands responsibility. Those who understand that they can't just sit at home and be babied. I know a couple of girls who still live off their parents and makes no effort to go finish school or to work.
• Mature. I cannot stand immaturity. Though it is true that most girls mature faster than guys, not all do and I don't want to baby sit someone till they finally decide to grow up.
• Open-minded. Someone who is willing to try new things or willing to accept new thoughts or ideas. Nothing kills a conversation faster than narrow-mindedness. Well... stupidity and igorance does as well.
• Wants children. I can't be with someone who doesn't want children. It just wouldn't work with me. However, if she can't have children and is willing to adopt, that is fine. It would be a little disappointing to me that I cannot have my own children, but I am willing to adopt to make up for it.
• Not materialistic. I know that we are all materialistic, but I cannot be with someone who only talks about money or only want more things. Let's face it... I will never be rich. No one can ever be with me for my money. lol.

Ooooh nice...^_^ This is def. an interesting post.

If there was a very safe and proven way *in the future* for men to be pregnant & give birth instead of the female, would u take one for the team and let Ur wife videotape the special moment instead? hehehe

Part 2: If it were a "normal" occurance, do u feel that men should be the primary person to give birth OR both share/take turns OR should always be a woman thing only forever & ever... and ever

Part 3 (and final) question: If ur wife was physically able to but just strongly prefers not to at all and U are willing to get pregnant & give birth - how many kids would u want then knowing that U'll be the one going thru the whollleee process....? Would ur # of kids preference change?

=o) If men were the ones who can give birth, i'd want 5-8 kids. (if financially able to) Since reality is what it is --- I'll stick to the slightly lower #'s hahaha.. *ouch*

Posted 1/31/2007 2:49 PM by injurypronegirl - delete - block user

To answer all your questions at once. If men and women were equal in all aspects, then there would be no division between men and women. Everyone would be a hermaphrodites. However, just to be fair, I would have kids if it was normal and not if it's not normal.


oh man. gotta give props to someone who shoots down eeleigna like that. :) entertaining thread indeed, lets make this super duper long so that it screws up everyones subscription browser.



what is the 1 most homosexual moment of your life that you can remember? im as straight as they come, but every dude's got one.. (i remember when i caught some dude staring at my penis at the urinal. he was a skinny fob)

Posted 1/31/2007 2:53 PM by whatdoyouseenow - delete - block user

Hmmm... this is a tough one. I think the most homosexual thing I have ever encountered was having to kiss a guy playing truth or dare. Personally, I found the act of kissing someone more unbearable than the fact that it was a guy.


Will you be my valentines this year, Raymond?
Posted 1/31/2007 3:09 PM by spotlessmindd - delete - block user

I'm sorry, I can't. I don't date. Maybe if you were my girlfriend?


you're only 5'8? okay, i take my proposal back. wait, you rejected me anyway.

one more question. where do you put your boogers once you've picked them?

Posted 1/31/2007 3:28 PM by eeleigna - delete - block user

Yes, I am not the tallest guy. I wish I was taller, but I think most people wish that.

As for second question... I usually just blow really hard and force it out. But if I had to pick my nose, I'd make sure I have some kind of tissue or napkin in hand before doing so.


you are getting a kick out of this arent you? thought u were busy...

should i get a $600 snowboard for $400 or get the $450 snowboard for $350 or not get one? let me guess... option #3?

Posted 1/31/2007 3:37 PM by its_jun - delete - block user

I am busy. I have been trying to do work and answer these questions at the same time. I got myself into this mess. But its fun. Time has been passing by rather quickly.

Anyways, I think if you have the money, get the one you want. Seriously, what's $50 if you like the $600 one A LOT more?


Who do you value more, Friends or Family?
Posted 1/31/2007 3:43 PM by simplyxmoi - delete - block user

This might sound as a cop-out answer, but I value family more only in the sense that I value my close friends like family. There are some people who I have developed a very special bond with through the years and they are like my brothers and sisters. I value them just as much as I value my real family members. But, if I had to choose, it would family.


first of all - kudos to u for revealing so much about yourself. it shows u dont have many insecurities which is awesome

and out of curiosity - how the heck did u find so many ppl to ask random questions??

Posted 1/31/2007 3:47 PM by girl_smileyy - delete - block user

I didn't find them. They found me. =)


No wonder youre single. the chick you described doesnt exist and if she did, youve got about 890,689,001 other guys in line waiting for the same chick. (me being #890,689,002)
Posted 1/31/2007 4:08 PM by deux02 - delete - block user

You are right. There are people like that and I have met them. But they are either taken or is not interested in me. What can you do except hope for the best? No one wants to be a hopeless romantic.


do you have a man crush? who is he?

what would you want for your 26th birthday?

Posted 1/31/2007 4:52 PM by its_jun - delete - block user

Not anymore. Seems like Man vs. Wild is no longer on television. Might have to wait till next season for the new shows.

As for my birthday present... how about you save money and not get anything for me. Instead, get yourself that board you that you wanted.



is this your way of asking me to be your girlfriend? ;)
anyway, you should be my valentines. i've already gotten you something.
Posted 1/31/2007 4:55 PM by spotlessmindd - delete - block user

lol. No. I wouldn't hint something like that. I'm just waiting for to watch that movie we were supposed to see.


what do men really want?
Posted 1/31/2007 5:13 PM by eeleigna - delete - block user

Wow... this is the toughest question so far. I think most men want money, power and respect. I say most because there are exceptions of course (myself and many others). But most men strive for those things... to be able to be in control, to be able to show off what they have... sort of like the kind of people Ayn Rand describes in her book, Fountainhead. She calls them, "second-handers." They are people who have no self... they live off other people. They always look for props from other people, compliments and such. They let society control their wants and whatever society values, men want. Society values fast cars, beautiful women, influence, etc. Most men want that.

For those who don't want that stuff like myself and many other men, we look for comfort. We look for the simple things like a loving girl, the feeling of being able to provide for that person and hopefully live well-off. Money is only a means. Power is only being in control of your own life and respect is what we want from those we love. So in a sense, some men want another kind of money, power, respect. But the difference would be because we deep down truly want it for happiness... not because of society's influence.

And of course, there are those who are in between, conflicted between self and society.



what is the most embarassing thing thats ever happened to you?

what is the most retarded thing you've ever done?

Posted 1/31/2007 5:14 PM by its_jun - delete - block user

The most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me was when I was in elementary school, someone thought it was funny to throw a fake spider on me. Now for those of you who don't know, I'm arachnidphobic so I'm insanely afraid of spiders. Anyways, when the spider landed on me, I freaked the fuck out and started screaming and crying. This went on for quite some time (almost felt like forever) and they had to call the ambulance because I was crying so much I couldn't breathe well.

I don't know what would be the most retarded thing since every stupid thing I've done, has taught me a lesson. It can be anything between dropping out of school, forging signatures, stealing, lying, etc.


im gonna read this in depth later but i got up to the 2nd or 3rd question and had to say. you wrote education and intelligence is synonomous but then wrote something that sounded contradictory. was that a slip or what?

if you meant the first part, i'll be the first to tell you i'm not formally educated but i am highly intelligent and i'm not boasting. i know you know that, too =P

Posted 1/31/2007 6:46 PM by moonbunny - delete - block user

I wasn't being contradictory. I was generalizing. I think intelligent people are born intelligent even before they are educated. I was trying to imply that most people who are smart and intelligent are educated. Synonyms are things that have similar meanings, but that doesn't mean they mean the same thing.
I know a couple of people who are really smart and have not finished school. Sometimes, school is just not their thing and if they can apply their intelligence to their work and still be successful, then they don't need an education.



when was the time you lied? what did you lie about?

Posted 1/31/2007 6:51 PM by Di_Gah_Jea - delete - block user

I lied about a lot of things. Everytime I did something wrong as a kid, I would cover it up with a lie. My first lie was when I was throwing around my sister's stuffed animals and it hit the light and broke it. When my dad asked me what happened, I said it fell down on it's own. This was when I was 6 or so. For pretty much the next 10 years, I lied about everything from stealing to smoking to cutting school/classes. I'd also exagerrated a great deal about people I know, things I've done, etc. It was pretty crazy because you lie so much that you begin to believe them to be the truth-- or you make it into truth because you have been lying about it for so long.


wth is wrong with all these questions!!! sooo stupid.. -_____-
Posted 1/31/2007 7:02 PM by kissmeplease - delete - block user

I don't find these questions stupid at all. In fact, I think some of these questions are pretty good.


is honesty beautiful?
Posted 1/31/2007 9:01 PM by spotlessmindd - delete - block user

I don't think so. I think at times, honesty can be ugly. But as ugly as honesty and truth is, it is a necessity of life and of society. The world we live in now moved world because there is slightly more honesty than lies. But how crazy would it be if everyone never had to lie and never had to pretend? Honesty is nakedness. If we saw everyone as they were and not behind some kind of mask or disguise; if we are able to completely understand someone's words because whatever that comes out of their mouth is the naked truth, there would be less misunderstandings. Is a naked person beautiful? Society says it's not because not everyone has the features to make them beautiful. If an ugly man walked out naked, would there be admirers or would be there screams of disgust? But... if you take that man and you made a sculpture of him naked, can it be beautiful? It can because the sculpture is no longer living. It is an embodiment-- an idea. The idea of honesty is beautiful despite the ugliness of it's reality.


Coke or Pepsi?
Posted 1/31/2007 9:32 PM by whudis - delete - block user

Always Pepsi. Pepsi is sweeter, lighter, crispier and doesn't leave that nasty syrupy feeling at the back of your throat. In the 60's I believe, there was a nationwide taste test between Coke and Pepsi. The majority chose Pepsi. Coke in response slashed it's prices and everyone caught on. By the time Pepsi tried to recover, it was too late. Is this story true? I really don't know for sure, because I heard it from my roommate, but I believe it to be true.

Anyways, to make my answer even longer, I was once addicted to Pepsi. I drank it everyday for about 5-6 years. It got really crazy in college where I HAD to have it or I wouldn't feel well. I was totally addicted and nothing else but a Pepsi could make me feel better. In my 5th year in college, I decided to quit and since then till now, I have had Pepsi about 10 or so times. Ironically, I drink Coke more often (still very rarely) simply because it's more accessible and the incomparable taste turns me off from soda.


This was very amusing and makes me wish I still had xanga at work. As for the girl you described, there are girls like that out there but 1) guys don't notice them or 2) there's no chemistry...in addition to ur reasons. Honestly, I think every time a guy lists their qualifications for a gf, they list all these great things, yet they end up going for the girls that treat them like crap. I'll never understand. Why would anyone subject themselves to that kind of treatment. It's the classic case of treating the b*tch like a princess and treating the one who really is good to you like dirt. Not you of course, but I'm just saying in general. I know, it goes both ways.


Here's another Q...what would it take for a guy to realize he's lost someone great? And what would make him go chase after it to try to win it back?
Posted 1/31/2007 10:01 PM by Little_B00 - delete - block user

If your question is 'why would anyone subject themselves to that kind of treatment,' then my answer would have to be because people just want to be with other people. They might meet someone they click really well with and because they are attracted, they tend to ignore their flaws. However, as time goes on, those flaws that were initially ignored come to surface and it begins to affect them. People let their feelings get the best of them and they do not think far enough. They become naive and believe that the other person will change for them. People CAN change--it's whether or not the person WILL change.

Personally, I would never be with someone that has traits I cannot stand. Immaturity for example is a big one. Someone who is bratty and spoiled and only thinks about herself is intolerable in my opinion. At first, she might tone it down because she doesn't want to lose you, but once she gets comfortable, her true side comes to light. And then what? Do you break up? Do you just wait and hope that she will grow up? Wishful thinking. In a real relationship, two people who love each other will attempt to do what they can for the happiness of the other. This may sound naive, but I have seen it too many times to pass it off as something that is possible, but unlikely. I think its very possible. People should not let their feelings get the best of them. They should think and play out all the consequences.

As for your second question, it's the same way a girl will realize that she has lost someone great. When these people compare who they are with to the person they have lost and realize that the previous person was great, then they begin to feel regret. I'm sure this has happened to many people.

As for at what lengths would a guy do to get that girl back... that depends on the guy. Some guys would do whatever it takes while other guys would simply just make an attempt. Others would not even try because they may feel either too ashamed/embarrassed and believes there is no point in pursuing a girl who would not give them another chance.


You don't date? Then how do you expect to find a girlfriend?
Posted 2/1/2007 12:35 AM by twenty2percent - delete - block user

This is an excellent question. I don't date because I think it's a waste of time. And when I mean date, I mean actively pursuing someone to gain their interest in you and vice versa. If my purpose of having dinner with a girl is simply just to have dinner and no other reason, then I don't see it as dating. I go out and hang out with girls all the time, but in no way am I trying to pursue them. I think with each interaction, we gain a little knowledge of the other person and since people who know each other tend to not to hide so much about themselves, it's easier to get to know them... as people. Dating is different. People go on dates and many of times, they are either hiding things about themselves or pretending to be someone they are not... just to impress the other person. I rather not go through with things like that. So to answer your question... I personally think that starting off as friends is great and if feelings get into the mix, though it might be a sticky situation where it might be harder to start a relationship, it would work out better in the long run if a relationship does happen.


Would you rather United win the Premiership or Champion's League?
Posted 2/1/2007 4:52 AM by infinitysurfer - delete - block user

Wow... another tough question. Personally, I think winning the Premiership is more glorifying. Sure the Champions League is against so many teams of great calibre, but where is the rivalry? It's different in the Premier League where you have teams like Liverpool, Arsenal and Chelsea who are great rivals. It's sort of asking me what would I choose... The Yankees winning the World Series or the Yankees winning the ALCS against the Red Sox. I would ALWAYS choose the latter. The prestige might not be as great, but the who really talks about the World Series games? Yet, the Yankees and Red Sox games are always talked about.


say you are 30 and yet to find that girl...what happens then do you settle for a less desired girl?
Posted 2/1/2007 11:22 AM by KeVoLuTiOn - delete - block user

I would never settle. I rather be single forever than to marry someone who I do not love. Anything short of that is being unfair to myself and the other person.


are you a christian? i kinda recall u mentioning but i'm not sure. if you are, how did u become a christian? hmm... if you're not, why not? do you ponder much about God?
Posted 2/1/2007 11:55 AM by viadolorosa - delete - block user

Yes, I am Christian. However, my beliefs are different of many mainstream Christians. I became Christian back when I was a dropout in school. I went to Church every Sunday and began to learn about the beliefs and the religions. I always believed there was a higher power, but a lot of things didn't make sense to me. Eventually, I came up with my own interpretations of beliefs and ideas. I never talk about them because I hate talking about religion to other people. Many times, people condescendingly lecture me on my beliefs. This is precisely why I do not go to Church. There are many people like that and honestly, how do you know you are right? You don't. You only believe that what you believe in is right. (Not you per se, but people in general).

I do not ponder about God. In fact, I never pray. I do not believe in praying. I do not believe God plays an active role in our lives. I do my best to be as moral as possible and if one doesn't sin (you are thinking that everyone sins), why must one ask for forgiveness? If I am determined to walk a straight line, why must I ask for blessing? If I feel that I already have the strength, why must I ask for strength? If I worked hard for my own things, why must I thank God for them? Blasphemous right? Which is why I choose never to talk about it. But I will answer your questions. No debates please.


have you ever cheated (either physically or emotionally) on a significant other? if you did, would you even dare to spill it here? if you've never, what do you think could make you stray?

Posted 2/1/2007 12:09 PM by whatdoyouseenow - delete - block user

Never. Any of my previous girlfriends will tell you that it is/was not possible for me to cheat. I always believe that even thinking about it is considered cheating. Yet, I have never thought about another girl when I was with someone. I do not think it is possible for me to cheat simply because there is no way one can seduce or tempt me. If I love the person I am with, I do not feel I am capable of thinking about another. Of course, there is a possibility because anything is possible. But I personally feel that it would never happen. All these years I have been single, I have not given anyone a chance, regardless of how nice they were or how pretty they look. Once I get locked on the feeling of wanting to be with a person, it would only be that person.



So let's say you never meet.marry a woman you could love (hopefully reality won't be that cruel) would you still have kids? How? Surrogate or Adopt? At what age would you choose to proceed with either option if you did have kids?

BTW, there's technology to choose the sex of your child since having a daughter seems like a must for you, if you have kids. That way the surrogate option wouldn't be an automatic NO due to the gamble of not knowing which sex. Also, let's assume the surrogate does not and has not used drugs or alcohol or exposed herself to any toxins or any other thing that YOU might have a concerns about.

Posted 2/1/2007 1:06 PM by shygurrl4 - delete - block user

I already wish to adopt sometime soon. But it is hard for a single male to adopt, especially since I would choose to adopt a girl. I have already looked into the possibilities of adopting in the next couple of years when I feel I am ready to be a parent. This is mainly because I am afraid that whoever I am with will not want to adopt and if I have already adopted someone before I have met them, then they would have no choice. Personally, I'm just dreaming. There is no way any government would allow me to adopt (not even China or any countries of Africa) because they are afraid of the underground sex slave trade of children.

If I could choose, I still wouldn't. Regardless of anything, something is done that is not natural. I would want a daughter, but if I never have any daughters, it's okay. It's just a preference. The fact that I have my own children would already be great.


when do you plan on traveling the world again? namely, when do you plan on visiting california? :)
Posted 2/1/2007 1:46 PM by jadie24k - delete - block user

I plan on visiting California soon: probably sometime this year. However, I'm not sure if I will be going to Bay Area are travel to Southern California. I am almost definite on my plans to travel to Japan in October. I am going to be backpacking through it so hopefully, I will see about 6-10 different cities/towns. I will be traveling alone because I love traveling alone. Hopefully, everything works out as planned.


dang. for how long will this keep on going?
Posted 2/1/2007 2:51 PM by guitar___riffs - delete - block user

Excellent question. This will keep up for.... Till the next time I post up a real entry, which would be Monday. I've been super busy today and will be super busy tomorrow. Thank goodness the amount of questions is slowing down. But keep them coming. I'm sure everyone is entertained. Don't worry if the question is too personal. I'll try to accomodate.


i'm just curious and not here to debate, if you do not think God plays an active role in our lives... does it mean God is just a small part of your life? what does "i am christian" mean to you personally?
Posted 2/1/2007 7:06 PM by viadolorosa - delete - block user

Honestly, God plays a very, very tiny role in my life. I never think about God because I don't feel that I need to. In my defintion of God, He is perfect. Something that is perfect cannot have emotions because that demonstrates weakness. Yes, emotions are weaknesses because that means you can be affected. If I can affect God, how perfect is God? I don't think He will feel neglected if I didn't spend my time thinking of Him or praying to him. I don't think He affects my life in anyway.

My reasoning of this is that there is suffering in this world. Millions of people suffer whether they are good or bad. Why? Is it a test? Is life really a trial to see who is worthy to enter the gates of Heaven? Why do people have to suffer to prove themselves that they are good? Sounds almost like hazing to me. In fact, life itself is both beautiful and cruel. It's like love. Everything is embodied into a four-letter word. The way we approach life is exactly the way we approach love. I do not think God makes people suffer and yet, I do not think that he heals people either. I believe He created this world and He just watches us from above. And that is the explanation of what "free-will" is.

What do I think being a Christian is all about? It's being a person who lives a moral life. One who will always do the right thing--that follows the basics of moral principle. One does not lie, cheat, steal, hurt, kill, etc. One follows the absolute sense of "duty" (as outlined by Kant). One does not do good because one wants to go to Heaven. One does good because it's the right thing to do. And of course, believe that Jesus Christ is the son of God and will "save" you from being damned in Hell. Are all sins forgiven? It can't be in my opinion. I hate when people say that "everybody sins." We all have the choice not to and yet, we give into it. How is it possible that a person who always gives into sins will be saved and forgiven and brought into Heaven?

Of course, I can be entirely wrong about this. Yet, living life righteously cannot possibly be going the wrong way. What have I got to lose? My dignity and integrity is intact at all times.


the question I've been asking everyone the whole week..so minus well ask you too:
"when was ur last dental visit and how often do you floss?"
Posted 2/1/2007 10:46 PM by whyitsmagz - delete - block user

My last dental visit was a year and a half ago. I do not floss often enough because I only do it when I remember, which is only a couple of times a week. =X


You (well, not you..but you know.) is one of your best friend. You think this guy likes you. So does everyone else. It's almost a fact, yet he's not admitting to it.. you think it's because he doesn't want things to be awkward between the two of you. And neither do you, which is why you don't bring up the subject. Do you ask or not? Or just assume he does based on how he acts, just to avoid awkwardness between the two of you.

Posted 2/2/2007 3:12 PM by simplyxmoi - delete - block user

If I was in such a situation and I had no feelings for the other person, then there is no reason for me to bring it up. I'll just pretend to be oblivious about it. No need to bring it up. It might be a phase and things might go back to normal. If you do have feelings for him as well and you are considering to give him a chance, then there would be a reason to bring it up. Somebody has to make the first move? Goodluck.


will you be trying to get into the lottery to run the nyc marathon this year? and if so, will you be doing any qualifying races?
Posted 2/2/2007 4:23 PM by fubabee - delete - block user

I will pray that I hit that lottery so I can run it this year, but regardless of anything, I will still run the 9 races that will qualify me for next year. I need the experience and the training and only running races will help me achieve that. I hope to finish at least 1 marathon in my life and I hope that it's this year's. Next year is too far away and it's hard to say if I will have time for it. But, who knows... life is full of surprises.


Are you kind to yourself? IF yes, why? IF not, then why not?
Second question: What part of your house do you feel "at home" the most?
Posted 4/17/2007 10:21 AM by dimntrg - delete - block user

I think I am kind to myself. I put my own wants ahead of everything. At the same time, those wants might mean the process of getting there is a tough process. For example, I really want to run a marathon and at the same time, not lose my size (muscle mass). Therefore, I run 3-4x a week and I lift 3-4x a week. This is definitely NOT easy and in fact, I virtually punish myself everytime I go to the gym. Despite how many people tell me they like the feeling of soreness, I hate feeling it and I hate waking up everyday feeling sore. So am I kind to myself in this sense? Definitely not. I push myself without regard and only through pain and suffering do I feel that I can attain both of these goals.

I used to feel most at home in my room, because I have a really comfortable reclining chair in front of my computer that has two monitors. The setup is just too comfortable. However, in the past 5-6 months or so, I have been just lounging on my couch all the time because I like to use my laptop more. It's also because the TV is there so I can watch sports or the news.




Should a person get what he wants or what he deserves? one for property and one for love.
Posted 4/17/2007 11:00 AM by billings - delete - block user

I personally believe that people do not deserve anything besides respect and that's if they have given it themselves. Other than that, whether it is love or property, no one deserves anything. If they want it, they would have to go out and get it. Why does one "deserve" anything? To who's standard or guidelines that people fullfill to justify that they deserve something? Anyone who feels they deserve anything is likely to be arrogant (though not always) because it is only within themselves did they feel that they have exceeded any expectation or standard. We live in a society where we are always comparing ourselves to the next person. I don't see why it has to be that way. When you judge yourself to be higher and judge someone else to be lower, you automatically feel as of you deserve more than them. The truth is, there will always be people who are higher and lower. So it is not to say who deserves what, it's more about whatever or not you will stop thinking about deserving something and actually going out to get it.




What's the funniest (true) story you've ever heard? What's the funniest thing that's ever happened to you that no matter what, always brings a smile to your face when you think about it or makes you laugh out loud even when you think about it? I think a whole lot of people can use some laughter and smiles today, so. Thanks!
Posted 4/17/2007 1:03 PM by moonbunny - delete - block user


There are a lot of stories that I hear that are laugh out loud funny, but most of them revolve around people who wish to remain anonymous. I will not name any names and will not hint as to who it is, but the following story has got to be one of the funniest stories I have ever heard. (No offense to the person this story is about if you ever read this!)

A bunch of my friends lived together when they were in college and there was one person in that group who everyone considered the "grimmiest". So upon asking one of my friends how "grimey" this person is, he told me a story that will forever prove that no one else in the world can top. In this house, people often ate other people's foods. Whether the food belonged to male or female, or whether the person was male or female, people ate each other's things without asking.

So one day, this roommate was in the kitchen and opened the fridge. Inside had a carton of OJ with a note that said, "Please ask first." (or something along those lines)

The person picked up the OJ and said, "Can I drink you?" And then proceeded to drink it! One other roommate was there and he couldn't stop laughing. Everytime I think about it, it makes me laugh. lol.

As for a stories that happened to me, there isn't any ONE thing that I would think back and crack up about. Usually, all my memories of happiness and craziness revolve around my college days. My fraternity brothers and I are a very tight-knit group and we often do some pretty crazy things to each other in order to punk each other. We've done everything from lighting firecrackers in front of their bedroom door, dousing ketchup and mustard on someone as they just gotten out of the shower, and even smoke bombing an entire house.

Actually, I just thought of a story that always makes me laugh. One day a whole bunch of us were driving to Albany to chill. We would pull up to cars along the way and wave at them. We did that to a bunch of cars and it was pretty funny. Soon, I see a red pickup truck in front of me so I speed up. I pull up along side the passenger side and everyone in car my waves. Inside were a guy and a girl, both around late 20s, blonde and pretty good looking.

The girl looked at us and started laughing and waved back. The guy who was driving looked and had a "WTF" face. This happened for like a minute until I was catching up to the car in front of me, which caused me to slow down. As I the red pickup truck was going farther ahead, I saw that the girl had put up a blue dildo on top of the dashboard.

I proceeded to scream out, "YO! You guys see that? She just took out a blue dildo and placed it on her dashboard!"

Someone in the car responded, "Really? No... shut up."

"I'm deadass." I replied. Soon, everyone in the car urged me to catch up to the pickup truck just to make sure. As I finally caught up and pulled up next to it, the blue dildo was in fact right there on the dashboard. So we all started laughing. The girl saw us and started laughing. She then picked it up and began playing with it in her hand, which caused a great uproar of laughter in my car. I even caught the guy laughing. And then, someone had a bright idea...

"Tell her to suck on it."

"How are we going to do that? Do the hand motion?"

"I'm not doing that... that's disgusting!"

"Well, why not just write it on a piece of paper and plaster it on the window?" I suggested. The bright idea came from the flashback from the "The Last Boy Scouts" with Bruce Willis and Damon Wayans. It was the scene where they tried to tell the other car that there was a bomb, by drawing it on a piece of paper and plastering it on the window for the other car to read.

Everyone in the car started looking for paper and a pen. Eventually, someone found it and wrote, "Can you please suck on it?" with a smily face. Right when he was about to put it up for the other truck to see, it exited. There was a short moment of silence, which reflected the disappointment. However, it only took a minute for someone to say, "Did we get all on tape?" Once again, there was an uproar of laughter in the car because the person holding the camcorder did in fact get everything.



Name one thing you really like about yourself and one thing you really dislike.
If you found out you were near the end of your life, what unsaid words or unfinished deeds would you want to complete?
Posted 4/17/2007 1:15 PM by Hahacincin2 - delete - block user

I like almost everything about myself. I like that I am not ugly (doesn't mean I think I'm good looking). I like that I'm relatively smart and is able to learn/pick up things really quick. I like that I'm a very moral person, always trying to do the right thing. I like that I'm confident in myself and my ability to get things done, while not being overconfident by understanding what my limits are. I like that I have learned to be an honest person and will always remain so. I like that I'm a stubborn person--stubborn with my own beliefs and never willing to stray from such principles. I like that I am not greedy for material things (doesn't mean I don't like to attain them). I like my attitudes towards life--just to always work hard, be honest, be responsible and to learn/gain as much as possible through different experiences.

As for dislikes, I hate that the fact that I'm not ambitious. I really feel that I am fully capable of getting more money and climbing higher in terms of career, but I have no motivation to do so. I could've been a doctor or lawyer or an investment banker, but instead, I chose the easy way out of things. I am a hardworker, but I would never sell my soul to work for money. At the same time, sometimes, I feel as if I am wasting my own potential because I am competent enough to climb to almost any height.


Did the senseless shooting at Virginia Tech U affect you in any way? What do you think about the US gun laws?
Posted 4/17/2007 1:40 PM by viadolorosa - delete - block user

In all honesty, it didn't affect me as much as it seems to have affected other people. I found the act atrocious, but maybe my cynicism told me that these things happen and can happen in this world. It was almost as if I wasn't surprised by such actions.

As for gun laws, I have always been an advocate for stricter gun control. Guns are easily purchased and smuggled from different states and I really hope that this incident will influence more gun control. If every state had extremely strict gun laws, these incidents would be less likely to happen. It is not to say that people can just blow people up by making their own bombs, but the truth is, if guns are so easily attained, why go through the trouble of making bombs? Killing someone with a gun is just so much easier.




do you still get those lingering feelings of depression? possibly during moments when you're not busy? if yes, how do you deal with it, what do you tend to focus your thoughts on?
Posted 4/17/2007 1:49 PM by Hahacincin2 - delete - block user

I do still get lingering feelings of depression. They usually last a week, but the most recent one lasting over 2. This phase just comes and goes and it has nothing to do with how much or how little work I have. In all honesty, I am always busy. Just ask any one of my friends who have to wait weeks to schedule something with me or even my sister who still hasnt been able to take me out for my birthday that was over 2 weeks ago. I deal with it by just remaining positive and try not to think about it. I continue with life. Just because I am depressed, doesn't mean life remains a standstill.



What is your opinion of powerful men who seek power or fame in order to attain women or "the" woman? And do you think these men are the majority of powerful men?
Posted 4/17/2007 2:30 PM by artworkjanalee - delete - block user

I think if being powerful attracts these kind of women, then I see no problem with it. These women look for men who have this power and these powerful men can only get women who look for such things. They actually fit together pretty well. These women would never be with me since I am neither powerful nor will be. So if someone like me is NOT what they are looking for, then there is no issue as to whether it is right for men to go to such lengths to attain power so that these women can take them into consideration.

It is hard to say whether I think it's a majority. Powerful men come in all shapes and sizes. We have powerful men who own/run legitimate businesses. We have those who are in organized crime and then we have politicians. They all have power and they all have a certain kind of control. However, I personally do not think they became powerful so that they can attain women. They became powerful because their ambition fueled them to want everything and maybe women are in that mix. I would say that the majority of these men want everything, women included, but not all of these men gained power just to get women.



Question: If/when you have children would you bring them up with a religion, or let them choose their own belief systems on their own? Furthermore, would you ever convert to another religion for a significant other?
Posted 4/17/2007 2:42 PM by QumQuat604 - delete - block user

I would teach them about all religions, but I would not try to influence them on what I believe in. My entire family is Buddhist and I was raised as a Buddhist. However, I didn't really know or understand what I was believing in. When I was in high school, I went to church with my cousin and she introduced Christianity to me. At first, I was really curious about the religion and then for whatever reason, I started believing in it. I think every person should have the right to choose what he/she believes in. With that said, I would NEVER change my beliefs because of someone--whether that person is one of my parents or my wife.



question: what's the point of burying a loved one in the ground if no one is ever going to visit them except for the death anniversary date? Wouldn't it be better to cremate the person and spread the ashes somewhere, than to have a rotting corpse that gets no visitation whatsover?
Posted 4/17/2007 3:40 PM by SecksyRx3 - delete - block user

It's not to say it's better since that is a matter of point of view. To my knowledge, people bury the dead because of religious reasons. They believed that the body should be intact so they can continue on after life in the underworld. Though cremation is better in terms of saving space and such, most people just do things because that's how things were always done. With that said, most places of burial are purchased land, and most people would get the most bang for their buck by using up the entire plot.

As for me, it wouldn't matter to me. I'm an organ donor so if I died, all my healthy organs would be shipped to various hospitals so people can get a transplant and hopefully continue on with their lives (though not easily since they will suffer for the rest of their lives). I wouldn't be fully intacted so it doesn't matter whether I am buried with a coffin or cremated. However, I still wish to be buried in the ground as opposed to have my ashes spread somewhere. This is because I want a tombstone and a place where people CAN visit if they do wish to see me.

This also brings me to the next thought on my mind. I want to buried next to my grandmother. I noticed when I went to visit her grave a couple of weeks ago that there is an empty spot next to her. I don't know how to bring it up to my parents that I want to purchase that plot. It's weird to tell your parents these things cause they would probably think that something is up and I'm not telling them something. Besides it's definitely not cheap (probably a couple of Gs), but I'd like to know that if I died in the near future, I would be buried next to her. The reason would be because she was the most important person to me in my life so far.



Some consider sex to be the ultimate act of intimacy, others believe that kissing or holding hands or just talking with another person is the greatest form of intimacy. What do you consider to be the ultimate expression (in a specific act) of intimacy, and why?
Posted 4/17/2007 4:48 PM by syntaxian - delete - block user

I too would consider sex the ultimate intimacy. When I was a kid (and still a virgin), I was native to think that sex wasn't that important and that a relationship shouldn't need sex to sustain itself. However, after being in many relationships, I realized that in fact I was wrong. In my opinion, you need sex to keep a relationship going unless of course both parties have the same values and believe that sex isn't important. If even ONE person thinks it is important because it demonstrates the greatest amount of trust and raw passion, then at least one party feels that the other party does not feel secure enough. In today's time, sex in relationship is so normal and natural that a relationship without sex is viewed as a problem.

When I was dating, I'd often say no. I really felt that I wanted to share my first time with someone special. I once thought there was someone who was special enough to share it with, but she said no and that was that. Eventually, we broke up and I decided that I could not have been more wrong about thinking she was the one and that I was in love. Therefore afterwards, I was really careful and said no. Finally, I did meet someone who I really loved and I gave it up to her. To me sex became something even more sacred and I became really choosy with who I had sex with. If I do not love her, I would have to say no. You'd be surprised with how many people I said no to. And just for the record, rejecting a girl might break her heart, but rejecting a girl for sex is like virtually telling her that she is ugly.

To make a long story short, I do feel it is the ultimate expression of intimacy and since I believe so, it's not something I can share with just anyone. Most people can, but everyone's values are different.



Would u like to go hang out sometimes when you come to Washington state (esp. seattle) to visit? =)

and, what's your all time favorite NON-fiction book?
Posted 4/17/2007 6:15 PM by stewardesses13 - delete - block user

Sure, why not. I'm open to hang out. I've met many people online and from Xanga. Meeting more people is fun. At the same time, I would never consider it a date since I never approach these meet ups with any interest at all.

My all time favorite Non-fiction book? With The Old Breed: At Peleliu and Okinawa. It is by E.B Sledge and it's a memoir about his experiences in WW II. It was written very well and I was really able to imagine everything that happened during the war.




what do you think about girls with braces?
Posted 4/17/2007 8:00 PM by Luvlymui - delete - block user

I don't think anything. In fact, I want to get braces myself. As long as they aren't the really huge and chunky ones, then it's all good. Having good looking teeth really makes a big difference on the smile.



When was the first time you had sex, and do you regret it?
When was the first time you got drunk?
Posted 4/17/2007 9:22 PM by iFYOUwereME_90 - delete - block user

The first time I had sex was when I was 17. I genuinely believed that I loved her at the time. We wound up having a really great relationship and throughout the relationship, I thought she was going to be the one I would marry and spend the rest of my life with. Therefore, I didn't regret it at all because I in fact really did love her.

The first time I got drunk was probably when I was 13-14. Unfortunately, there is no exciting story. We had drank lots of beer at a school yard in the middle of the night. I really had to struggle to get home. The feeling was terrible. It was a good thing home was only a block away. It sure didn't feel that way though.



okay. so you're small blind and you have ace jack. everyone just calls as do you. there are five players in the pot, including you. flop comes.. K K J rainbow. i bet the minimum, big blind calls.. one guy folds.. and the "quiet" guy who has hardly played a hand, raises. last guy folds. what do you do?? do you call, raise, fold?
Posted 4/17/2007 10:12 PM by miss_lyrical - delete - block user

I think you meant that I'm on the button, since I would be betting first if I was small blind? This question is really hard to answer because a lot of variables come into play. Firstly, I'd have to know if we are playing limit or no-limit. I will assume no-limit since I never play limit so the stakes are 1-2 no limit. Secondly, what was the bet pre-flop? Just calling? The quiet guy who has been playing really tight all night limped in. He was in a good position however and it would've been a good idea for him to have bet pre-flop. If he didn't, then I would assume he has low pockets or connectors. I don't think he has premium cards or anything of that sort because it would've been in his favor to bet pre-flop. He would eliminate those who didn't have anything and raise the pot in his favor. In this case, I would raise. Raising in my opinion would test to see if he was bluffing. I'd bet enough to raise the pot that doesn't put him into favor (since he is already pot committed in a way by raising). I would play it like I had a K because I assume that he is either going for a straight or has two-pair. I might lose and might lose a lot of money. However, I have always been an aggressive player and as long as I don't lose all my money, I think it is worth it to see his cards.



why are some guys so tactless in their actions?
and how would you feel if a random, but cute, girl approached you on the street?
Posted 4/18/2007 12:40 AM by Stacily - delete - block user

I really have no idea why guys are so tactless sometimes. I think ultimately, these guys might be a little more on the selfish side and cater to only their own needs. However, the same can be said about girls. I've seen equal amounts of this from both sides and it might be the way they are raised or it just might be their personality to do whatever they want.

I've had many people approach me on the street. Most of the time, they'd stop me and say, "Excuse me... are you jigg from Xanga?" It's something really weird and I don't know how to react to it, despite it happening to me so many times. I'm a pretty open person in general and many people who read my Xanga know that they can easily start a conversation with me either online or through email. I guess if a random girl came up to me on the street, I'd just carry on a conversation like I normally would. Whether she is cute or not, will not change that approach. It is not to say however, that I am not affected by her looks, but my principles tell me never to discriminate. I cannot assume she is approaching me cause I am good looking or she is interested. Maybe I look like someone she knows... maybe she recognized me from my Xanga or maybe she is just asking for directions. What the case may be, I would welcome any approach (male or female, beautiful or ugly) the same. Unless of course, you appear crazy to me... but that's another story.



what's your definition of love?
does your definition change with each relationship? do you still believe you were in love with the first girl you were "in love" with? (sorry, is that three? use your discretion.)
Posted 4/18/2007 1:11 AM by leideevie - delete - block user

My definition of love is pretty complicated. I think love is when you have this feeling of always being there for that person. You want that person there and you want to give everything in your ability to this person. You always want to see a smile on their face because it makes you smile. When they cry, you cry inside and you want to change that. Love is an attitude of selflessness, but in an egoist kind of way. You do everything to make that person happy because this makes you happy.

This is not to be confused with unconditional love. Unconditional love is only giving and in my opinion, not something that is possible. Unconditional love probably hovers along obssessed or fanatic--the same feeling as I described earlier, but also without regard to anything and having no wants in return. I think this kind of love is only possible between parent and child, where the parent will love the child no matter what the child does. I think the vast majority cannot love their significant other so much that they are willing to forgive whatever (or all) actions this person performs.

Hindsight is 20/20. In hindsight, I can say that I didn't love every girl I dated or at the moment I felt that I loved them. I was naive to think that. Unfortunately, in every relationship I was in, it didn't work because as time went on, the girls began taking advantage of my feelings towards them and began to take me for granted. I can say without a doubt that every girl I have dated wished at one point that they could have a second chance with me. However, I would say that I did in fact love two girls at that moment. The first would be the girl who I thought I'd spend the rest of my life to and the second being the girl who I was constantly trying to accept.

Did that definition change after each of these relationships? I would have to say no. Instead, the experiences I received from these relationships only refined (yes, technically, even refining is considered a form of change) my thoughts about love and I began to understand it from a realistic and idealistic point of view, instead of just being naive and looking at love idealistically.



"I could've been a doctor or lawyer or an investment banker, but instead, I chose the easy way out of things. I am a hardworker, but I would never sell my soul to work for money."are you equating being a doctor/lawyer with selling your soul for money?
Posted 4/18/2007 1:52 AM by joyCC - delete - block user

You are right--or at least partially. I have mistaken and equated being a doctor was selling my soul for money. I would say the latter two (lawyer and investment banker) are with the exception of being a prosecutor.

When I was in JHS, I wanted to be a doctor. I applied to the best science high schools so that it would prepare me for going to a good college and one day to med school to become a doctor. This attitude changed... not because I was afraid of blood or afraid of all the hardwork that was put into it. I became a drop out in school and really had no future. As I began to get my life back together, my thoughts changed dramatically. I realized that besides spiders, I was afraid of one other thing--regret. I guess it was at this moment of recovery that I felt that I had no confidence in myself and I didn't have what it takes to amend mistakes. I would say that I was afraid to be a doctor because I was afraid to feel regret--regret that whoever I was treating died. I understand that doctors cannot perform an act of God and save everyone. They do whatever they can in their power to, but sometimes, even their best might not be good enough. I really felt that I didn't have the confidence at that moment to ponder what it would be like to be a doctor. So to all the doctors out there, I commend you.

As for being a lawyer, all my life, every relative of mine thought it was best that I became a lawyer. Someone who always liked to debate and argue, who was never afraid of confrontation--seemed that law would be a good thing for me to do. During the same stage of self-reflection (above), I knew I wasn't cut out to be a lawyer. I know the following will be a direct criticism of lawyers and if I have offended anyone, please accept my sincere apologies. It is only my opinion and I can/may be entirely wrong. I also do not know you, so I will not judge you and your intentions. With that said, my reasons for not being a lawyer was simple. I couldn't be a criminal lawyer because I couldn't defend those who are wrong. I couldn't be a corporate or business lawyer because I would be doing it for money (since there is no other reason in my opinion). I could not be a not-for-profit lawyer because I'd be employed by organizations that may practice or believe certain things that I myself would not believe in. I could not be a prosecutor because I know I would try every defendant like he/she was guilty and I'd never forgive myself if I found out that the person I sent to jail for life, was in fact innocent. Call me a coward (I am calling myself this), but I am really afraid of regret.

As for an investment banker, there is no other reason than for money would someone go into this profession. I'd really be selling my soul if I became one.

As for doing something meaningful, I try to do as much as I can. I majored in History hoping to one day become a Historian. I strayed away from that path because of my own stubbornness. I have a desk job now that has somewhat interesting work. It's only interesting because I learn as I work so it's a good experience for me since I like learning. It pays the bills which is good, but I don't earn enough to live luxuariously. I don't mind it. I like the fact that I have free time and I can pursue other goals and interest. So some people work for money and some people work to survive. I guess I am the latter. I hate when people say, "Life's too short so..." Life isn't really short. However, time doesn't stop for us. I think ultimately, we should all pursue what is genuinely important to us.



how are things with your parents/family? i know you said in the past they "hated" you. i put it in quotes because it's such a strong word and i wonder if our parents can ever really really hate us despite how bad we screw up. between those years and now, have you and your parents ever had an opportunity to sit down to reflect on those years? they must have been really touched by your transformation.
Posted 4/18/2007 11:26 AM by Hahacincin2 - delete - block user

At one point in my life, my father pretty much disowned me. I mean, I didn't even call him "dad" for like close to 3 years. I just lived there and did my thing. Eventually, we started talking again and things got somewhat better. However, I would also throw out that our relationship only got better, but still not good overall. By the time I turned 19, I moved out. Eventually, I transfered from Baruch College (a school in NYC) to Binghamton University (a school in upstate NY about 3 hours away). I lived there for about 3 years, only coming home when I had to. Afterwards, when I graduated, I moved to Hong Kong.

All this time away from them really helped us out. When I moved back, I had to decide whether to live with them or not. I decided that I was 24 already and I should really give it another chance. We lived together for a year. We lived more like roommates than like family. I paid rent to them and we shared the chores around the house. They spoke to me like a friend as I did to them. So right now, our relationship is really good. I'd often take my mom out to eat and talk (probably twice a month). Sometimes, if there was a good movie out, I'd take her to see it. She loves action and horror movies, so I try to take her when she is free. As for my dad, we hang out from time to time too. We usually talk about politics and stuff, but we have gotten a lot closer and I think he enjoys our time together.

I can tell that both my parents want to make our relationship work. Are they proud of what I have achieved or who I became? I wouldn't say so. I think all along, they expected me to be like this and I'm almost positive they take all the credit. They never understood any of the internal battles I had to go through. They do not believe that they contributed to any of my problems. But that is all the past. I can never say that I will love them like I love my grandmother, but I respect them as my parents and unfortunately (or fortunately), I will love them more as friends.



Here's my question: What's the best way to wake up in the morning?
Posted 4/18/2007 11:38 AM by alternate_universe_princess - delete - block user

The best way to wake up is naturally and not with an alarm or noise. If that wakes you up when you are in the middle of REM (rapid eye movement or deep slee), you will wake up groggy. If the alarm happens to wake you up when you aren't in deep sleep, you will wake up feeling more refreshed.

Believe it or not, I don't even have a clock in my room. When I wake up, I have to either check my cellphone or the cable box in the living room to see what time it is. I do set an alarm on my cell phone, but that is just in case I wake up late. I never depend on it and I always wake up when I am supposed to. However, getting up is a totally different question.



Tell me what you think of my most recent entry.
Posted 4/18/2007 11:42 AM by jL0v3 - delete - block user

Many people have voiced such concerns on their blogs the last two days. I tried not to write about this incident because I figured people were tired of talking/hearing/reading about it. I have read up a lot on this whole issue--probably every bit of news article that I can find.

Is the media biased for emphasizing that he is S. Corean more so than other things? I really don't know. I say this because in all fairness, I notice that they label everyone by race. In fact, race is one of the main descriptions that almost always appears when describing criminals... whether he was a "white male" or "african-american," etc. I have noticed that when labeling someone from Europe, they would say, "British" or "French" when describing other white people. So nationality is almost always mentioned.

Think back to Monday when they found out that the shooter was Asian... how many people wondered Asian from country? I'm sure EVERY Asian person wondered. After the initial shock that the shooter was identified to be a part of our race, we all quickly wondered from where. The media quickly notified us of this bit of information yesterday when he was identified. Keep in mind that when they found out about Timothy McVeigh, they did in fact label him as "a white American" and that he served in the armed forces. Everyone thought that the bomber was from the outside, so this bit of necessary information came as a shock.

As for your point about how the media tried to find out why McVeigh did it and not wonder about Cho, you also have to understand that it took a while before they were able to establish anything from McVeigh. This unfortunate incident happened on Monday and it was only yesterday that the shooter was identified. We cannot compare two things on equal planes when they are both NOT equal.

Is the media biased? Maybe, depending on who the journalist. Are they ignorant? Maybe, but more likely to be racially insensitive. Are Asian-Americans looked as outsiders? Most certainly. But the same can be said when we go back to our "native countries." Our "people" are just as quick as labeling us as "outsiders." Asian-Americans will always be labeled as outsiders, regardless of where we are. In my life time, I am confident enough to say that only black people and white people will be accepted and everyone else will always be regarded as an outsider. Maybe one day, the hispanics will eventually be accepted. Asians only represent 4% of the total population in this country and of that number, we have to divide by nationality.

Are you right in what you wrote? I wouldn't say that you are wrong. However, I think we are just more sensitive to these labels because they point at us. Do never really notice it when they say, "white" or "polish" or "german" because unconsciously, these things aren't important to us. I do think that the emphasis is important to report news accurately. If you were a journalist, would you leave out the information that he was Corean? Would you leave out the bit that he is not a US citizen and in fact someone who immigrated to the US? Maybe in all fairness, the media should've emphasized that he had been here since he aws 8 as opposed to just providing a date. However, as a journalist, your job is to report as much information as you can find. How you interpret and relate that information is the issue. I just don't think there is any other way--especially if you know that other journalists with the same bit of information would never hold back on it. It is all about competition and who can find the most info to report.



If you were to die right this moment, what are some things you would regret not having done?
Posted 4/18/2007 2:47 PM by PulsarBabe - delete - block user

I would regret not finding the person I wished to spend the rest of my life with. I'd regret not living long enough to be a husband and not long enough to be a father. However, if I knew I would be dying young, then I would purposely not do those things. Better to die alone than to leave a widow in my opinion.


Do you prefer Raymond or Ray?
Posted 4/18/2007 2:47 PM by jL0v3 - delete - block user

I actually prefer Raymond, but nobody calls me that. Most people call me ray or jigg. Anything is fine and I respond to any of the three.



Do you think a relationship is based on give and take? If so, what do you think either parties are responsible to give?
Posted 4/18/2007 12:50 PM by chuyibles - delete - block user

I think all relationships should only be based on give. If both parties just focused on the other person, then both parties will be completely satisfied. Of course, this is just the idealistic relationship. The reality of it is that relationships are in fact based on give and take. People usually want something in return for what they give. Some of these things are love, respect, consideracy, attention, responsibility, and priority. Other things might be sex, money, power, and other material objects. Not all relationships are based on love. The ones that are based on materialism are easy to classify and figure out because it's almost based on a barter system. But the ones that are based on love... everything you want from the other person, you must give.



I know you have traveled many places, and have experienced living outside of NYC for relatively long periods of time. Do you see yourself settling your roots in NYC or do you think you'll move elsewhere? Why?
Posted 4/18/2007 4:49 PM by jadie24k - delete - block user

NYC will always be "home." I can envision myself living anywhere, but I'm not so sure for long term. There are a lot of unforseeable circumstances that may cause me to relocate. For example, if my wife had to relocate and I was able to secure another job at that place and raise a family, I'd do it. I don't think that's going to really happen, but it's very possible. I LOVE New York and everything about it. A lot of people tell me they are sick of this place and they wish they can move. I don't understand why people feel they have to restrict themselves in any particular place, especially if they don't like it here. If I hated it here, I'd go somewhere else.




How do you want people to remember you on Xanga?
Posted 4/18/2007 7:08 PM by J_Angil - delete - block user

Interesting question. I want them to remember me as who I portray myself to be. Maybe to them I'm really thoughtful and profound. Maybe to them I am self-centered and crave for attention. Maybe to them, I'm just a good writer who has something interesting to say. I want people to remember me as who they think they know me as. No two people will feel exactly the same way because we all have different values and backgrounds. However, one thing is for sure, I just want people to read what I write. I want people to respect me as a person because of my efforts of trying to be thought provoking.

My girlfriend asked me, "if you had to choose between watching football and sex, which would you choose?" Without hesitation, I responded, "football of course!" She gave me this smirk and I wondered if she noticed my sarcasm or if she found my answer amusing.

"I'm just teasing," I said and smiled back. "Just a regular football game and not the Super Bowl? Sex of course," I continued. She knew about how I wished Super Sunday was a holiday.

"I think most guys would choose football," she said.

"Really? I don't think so," I responded.

"I think so. Most men love their football. You love the Super Bowl," she said.

"Sex and Super Bowl aren't even on the same level--unless it's sex with Charlize Theron or something," I said.

She squinted her eyes, straightened her lips (- __ -) and said, "Gee, thanks honey."

"I'm just teasing!" I screamed.

"Uh-huh. Sure," she said.

She suggested that we ask my friend. His response? He actually had to think about it. "On paper it would be football, but when it comes down to it, it would be sex." The response was quite reluctant and realistic at the same time.

"Your response of football might affect your chances of sex later on," I joked. He laughed and said, "That's thinking ahead." It was true. Imagine his girlfriend found out he chose football over sex? No more sex for a while.

"I heard there was a poll where people had to choose between not having sex or one year or not use their cellphones for a year and most people chose cellphone," my girlfriend said. Now this was a tough choice.

Guys--if you had to choose. You haven't had sex in a week and it's Sunday. Sex or football?

How about no sex for a year versus not being able to use your cellphone for a year? Guess what my choice was.